Me? The Queen of Positivity? You want to know MY feelings about the "Spread Love" holiday?
Let's just say I'm not a fan of commercializing Love.
Not what you were expecting? Allow me to share my story with you, and you shall understand. In retrospect, I find the humor in these moments, and I am feeling vulnerable enough to share them with you.
I have a history of breaking up with people on Valentine's Day.
As it turns out, I broke up with a man who was going to propose to me on Valentine's Day once. I found out six months later that he had custom designed a ring (from the sounds of it, the most beautiful, wonderful, thoughtful, magical ring I could have ever imagined, tailored specifically to my personality and desires). They say that you "just know" if it's right or not. We both got to that revelation at the same time, I guess, but took opposite paths. Whoops!
The next year, I broke up with my then boyfriend just after the Superbowl. We both felt abnormally crummy about the emotionless breakup (he was basically my best friend and the breakup itself just seemed so... blah), so we tried to take it back. That obviously didn't work. We parted as friends, deciding that it really was best after all, both single just in time for Valentine's Day.
Two years later, I was dating a fellow who had just moved from 400 miles away to about 80 miles away (it was a great long-distance relationship), and I drove up to see him two weekends in a row. We really weren't getting along during our friends' Superbowl party, and worse so when we were alone, to the point where it became apparent that we weren't the right fit for one another. So, unable to shake my belief that romantic relationships should both begin and end in person, I made a special trip (Valentine's Day weekend) solely to break up with him.
Oh, this story isn't over yet, though. It gets better!
The breakup itself lasted only about 3-5 minutes, 3-5 minutes after I walked in the door! He was trying to rush me to dinner; I was trying to make sure that we broke up before we went anywhere and dragged things out. We decided to go out for dinner anyway because we were both starving and it just made sense. Who doesn't go out to dinner after a breakup? We had a great time at the bar watching hockey over beer & wings, laughing at our friends' reactions to our breakup (we were just cool like that).
When we made the decision to grab dinner, we both knew that it would probably be too late and snowy for me to drive home, but that was okay. Then, I got snowed in. For two days. Yup, two days of shoveling ours and the neighbor's cars out, playing computer games, and sharing meals with my oh-so-very-recently EX-boyfriend! We ended up braving the storm around dinner time to visit our friends down the street so that we could avoid some very awkward evening hours home alone in a rather small apartment. Our friends didn't even realized that we had broken up a day prior until well into the evening, talk about awkward moments!
Once the state-wide driving ban was lifted the next morning, I braved the unplowed highway. Yes, you read that correctly. Unplowed highway. Apparently the driving ban banned cleanup crews as well because there was fresh powder, akin to what you might encounter on a ski slope, on the only road to take from my ex's apartment to my job. It was either drive to work or go back to my ex's. I don't think we could have handled another day of the, albeit peaceful, awkward vibe, and I have an odd sense of obligation about going to work. Against my better judgment, I drove 80 miles alongside, plows, front-loaders (which were hired to clear the sheer volume of snow off the road), and a few idiots who thought that passing me in an unplowed, uneven lane with a one ton vehicle going 40+ mph was a good idea. Luckily there weren't many of those, since they would have had considerably more maneuverability with snowmobiles. As if my weekend wasn't obscure enough, I gathered too much speed on a long stretch downhill, lost any and all breaking ability, fishtailed and spun out traveling less than 25 mph into the snowbank atop the passing lane! Luckily, I carry a shovel in my trunk. You may laugh, but it has come in handy on more than one occasion! I was able to get myself out of that predicament in under 5 minutes, once the 3 or 4 passing cars realized that I had everything under control and just needed space for a K-turn. Complete panic had turned to a calm sense of accomplishment and determination!
We usually go out for dinner on a friend-date (if the weather holds up)! I think those are the best kind. No romantic pressure. For a new romantic relationship, Valentine's Day often puts too much pressure. For an established one, maybe it creates a good excuse to do something wonderful for someone else or maybe it causes added stress. I'm not a fan of stress. Or pressure, unless it is the exciting anticipation kind. This Valentine's Day, my best friend happens to be in another country, and my next-best friends are either men who I wouldn't like to get the wrong idea by asking to hang out on Valentine's Day and/or romantic types with dates. So, I have plans with my Aunt.
I've actually had these plans on my calendar for the past 2 months. Valentine's Day is sad day for her, so she needs a date more than any of my friends or potential lovers do. I never did get asked, but I made it known to any potential suitors that I was already busy! Having prior plans works out perfectly because I'm simply not a fan of going on a date just to have a "Valentine," anyway. The precedent is all wrong. So, my Valentine's Day plans are to spend the day with my Aunt. No pressure required!
If you knew her, you would laugh at the irony behind this statement. I was required to call her on Thursday with a proposed itinerary! In this case, that's a good thing; if you're going out, planning ahead is absolutely necessary on this crazy day of Love!
Tears. Laughter. Good food. Great friends. Family. Funny stories.
That's my idea of the perfect Valentine's Day.
Message of the Day: Laugh. Laugh at my crazy Valentines and your own. You won't always have a date. It doesn't have to be the most romantic day of your life. Just show some Love to those you care about, and enjoy the day!
...Or don't. It won't change my reality. Cheers!
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